Mardi Gras

Dear Diary,
I have a confession to make. After joining the gym, I purchased a 20 oz bottle of soda.  I ate several gummy bears I found in the cupboard.  I also purchased a candy bar and a bag of artificially flavored chips and offered to pick up fast food for dinner tonight.

I know the Mardi Gras mentality stems from the idea that tomorrow is another day and I am seeing this as my last hoorah prior to buckling down to discipline that is my life from here on out.

Well THAT sure makes me look forward to this whole process!

I think I need an attitude adjustment.

Affectionately,
Jane

The Commitment

Dear Diary,
I am struggling.  My energy level is nonexistent; I am completely dependent on caffeinated soft drinks to function.  I am an emotional wreck and periodically lose my cool with my family.  Getting dressed is the worst part of everyday: I hate trying to hide my body, and I hate looking at myself in the mirror.  I feel as if I've aged 20 years overnight when I ought to be in my prime.  The last straw was when my husband tried to look at me getting out of the shower and I wouldn't let him because I feel so terrible about myself.

I need to make a change.  I need to make a commitment to love myself.  I need to make a commitment to care enough for myself to give others a reason to care for me.  I need to take the time out of my day to make my health a priority, because if I don't, no one else will.

Today I took the first step: I purchased a gym membership.

I will not be one of the millions of people who start on a health kick only to fizzle out after a few weeks.  I will persevere.  I will make myself accountable to cyberspace and anyone who would like to join me on my quest. 


Affectionately,
Jane